I earned this chocolate bar today.
Sit back and get ready to laugh at or with me as I give you the details as to why the above statement is true.
For once there were no plans on the agenda, no errands to run, and most of the cleaning was caught up. I knew I’d have two very squirrely kids though if I stuck around the house all day. The weather started off mild and overcast so I decided a couple hours at the park this morning would do us some good.
Both kids had a blast running around, getting pushed on the swings, teeter-totter and merry-go-round. They climbed the jungle-gym and slid down slides. Sprout chased birds and ran away from every squirrel he saw (he’s a bit traumatized after a couple incidents with some aggressive, human-food crazed ones).
Bean scavenged sticks and leaves. This one she called her “Halloween stick” and waved it around like a magic wand. Very appropriate for the July 15 morning, right Harry Potter fans?
My plan seemed to be working: get the crazies out at the park and make the afternoon at home a breeze (in other words, lunch and then nap until Papa got home).
Once it was clear that we were all pretty much done, I packed everyone up into the van and doled out the snack traps and sippy cups for refreshment on the way home.
When we got home I took a bit of a rest on the couch (I was tired from chasing them and having dumb Braxton Hicks) while the kids played.
Next thing I know Bean is announcing while giggling, “Mama, I’m changing me.” Huh? “Bean, did you have an accident?” No answer. “Bean, did you go pee-pee in your undies?” No answer. “Bean, come here!”
Naked buns come into view as Bean skips over giggling and waving a pair of purple elephant-print undies.
“Did you go pee-pee in your undies?”
More giggling. “Yeah! I went pee-pee in the train and I dumped it out all over the floor!” More giggling.
More giggles as I am now quickly moving towards the kitchen where both kids had been playing. “I went pee-pee in my undies in the train and dumped it out all over the floor!” Giggles have turned into high-pitched squeals of delight and mischief.
Upon entering the kitchen, I discover things pretty much as she said: a giant puddle of pee that looked like it had been either played in or walked through numerous times. A wet ride-on train with some pee still in the cargo section.
This is actually the second time we’ve had this incident. And it is definitely an on-purpose thing, not an accident thing. Peeing in the train’s cargo section has become a novelty for some reason. Gross. I tell her to put on her undies and go sit in time-out while I clean up.
“This is yucky Bean! Pee-pee belongs in the potty, not the train or your undies. This was very naughty!”
Luckily, I can block off the kitchen with our gate so no further mess making can occur while I ready the mop and towels and spray. Or so I thought.
As I am soaking up a majority of the puddle with a towel, there is another round of maniacal laughter coming from the bathroom along with the metal clanging sound that accompanies our stainless steel toilet scrubber.
I round the corner of the kitchen to see said scrubber in the hands of Sprout, several chunks of wet toilet paper, more splotches and puddles, the plunger soaking wet and laying in the hallway and Bean caught with that “Oh crap, I know I am in big trouble!” look on her face as the giggles come to a sudden halt.
All I can say is thank goodness for laminate floors throughout the house. I parked each kid in their booster seat, buckled in, so no more shenanigans could occur while I now cleaned up both messes.
Then I called Stephen and he laughed the entire time I told the story. It was hard to be angry after that. And like he said, “Every parent I’ve ever talked to has stories just like this.”
Lunch was made. Naps were instituted. A chocolate bar was procured from the pantry.