Cherish the children

A few weeks ago Stephen said, “Somewhere along the way you stopped freaking out and decided that you are going to do this, be a mom, and you are going to do it right.”

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Not that there is a “right” way to do motherhood. Not that if you don’t do everything exactly like me, you are doing it “wrong.” I think life becomes so much easier when we stop being such hard-asses and realize that for quite a lot of things in life there are many “right” ways to do something. It’s been a slightly painful lesson for me to come to terms with, wrought with hurt feelings and what seem to me now as silly offenses and hills not worth dying on.

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I knew what he meant. Somewhere along the way I decided to stop living in regret. I stopped looking for journalism jobs online, researching midwifery and law schools on the tough days. I decided to accept that this is my life and it is full and I’m no less of a person just because I didn’t pursue every avenue of interest and schooling.

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I decided that this truly is a noble calling, worthy of my energy and efforts. That throwing a tantrum about my lot in life that would rival one of my (almost) three-year-old’s, wasn’t going to get me anywhere and was more wasteful than anything.

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I chose this life. So why live in regret, thinking about the what-ifs of what might have happened if I had chosen another path?

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Why let myself feel inferior to the friends that were some of the academic elite growing up and are now working professionals in medicine, non-profits, journalism, education, and law? I did that. I got the bylines, the plastic awards. I did that and was never satisfied like I am now. Never felt or saw the direct influence and difference of my work like I do now.

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These guys, they grow so fast. They deserve a mother fully engaged in their lives. They deserve to be loved and nurtured and cherished with my all.

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I am told that 18 years goes by faster than you think possible when you are a parent. I don’t want this all to be some blurry fog that I “survived” just barely. So here’s to living life fully, to giving it my all.

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4 Comments

Filed under Family, Parenting, Ramblings

4 responses to “Cherish the children

  1. Barbie

    You made me cry. AMEN…to everything you said!

  2. Auntie Linda

    Well, you made me cry too…with special feelings and love for you and your “little” family! Never have regrets, my dear, you are amazing and strong – sure a career is great for some, but this life you have chosen does and will bring very satisfying rewards…and you bring them to me, too, everytime you I see you or read your blog. I Love You!

  3. oh, Lisa, I just LOVE this post. I love it because you echoed the sentiments of my own heart perfectly. I love it because this is exactly what it is to be a mother. And I also love it because I have seen you struggle from time to time (like we all do) with motherhood and “finding ourselves”, and it fills me with joy that the Lord has you right where you are, a mother to those three beautiful babies, and that you are cherishing every minute of it. πŸ™‚ I praise God for what He has done with your life, and for the mother you are. Thanks for sharing this<3

  4. Sunny

    Beautiful! I got a lot of flack when I announced I was quitting the interpreting world to move across the country to be a wife and future mom. But there will always be someone who can take my place in the professional world, maybe someone who was even better than I was, but no one on earth can replace me as a wife and mom. No one. I was harped on that the deaf world needed me and my skills but that isn’t my first obligation. I have no regrets. Maybe someday I’ll return to the working world on a regular basis, but maybe I’ll find something else I like even better. πŸ™‚ I appreciate the experiences I had; a big lesson learned helps me as a housewife- I know how much a homecooked meal waiting for me at the end of the day is looked forward to! Ha ha! (Now do I always do that for my husband, heck no, but I try to remember how I felt.) Maybe right now we’re not earning the praises of our peers and superiors but someday our husband and children will rise up and call us blessed. Absolutely worth it, in my opinion.

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