Show off.

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I feel like my heart is breaking over my entire way of life and human nature. And what technology has done to life.

It’s a good thing. Trust me. I’m not depressed. Just working out my faith and feelings about the world.

I am starting to question the existence of this blog.

I could argue that I am documenting things for posterity and for my family to keep tabs on us. But if that is truly the case, why do that in the public sphere? I mean basically this blog can be summed up as an exercise in pride.

Look at me! Look what I sewed or made! I am so incredibly skilled and creative!

Look at my beautiful children and our awesome family and how funny and great we all are! Laugh hysterically at the hilarious things my kids say!

Look at how we are in no way poor and can basically do whatever we want with little consideration for cost or others in less fortunate situations.

Look at these awesome meals I cook! Look at how we eat awesome food and we are so great about supporting small farms and making the planet better through our food choices!

Look at the awesome photos I capture of our awesome life!

Look! Look! Look!

Oh and wait, don’t just look at how awesome I am (and my life is), please comment and tell me about it.

Feed the ego.

Please read my incredibly awesome thoughts on life and the world and parenting! Because I am awesome! I do things the right way! The only way! I am doing awesome at life!

It makes me sick. I am privileged beyond measure compared to much of this world and all I do is squander it and make a spectacle of myself with it.

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5 Comments

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5 responses to “Show off.

  1. Dearcaralou

    I know exactly what you mean! And I have the same thoughts and feelings every day. And then I get even more frustrated cause it’s such a first world debate to even be having with oneself! Ha!

    But, I would be sad if you stopped writing this blog. Especially now that you’re off FB! I like seeing the things you make and do. 🙂

  2. Barbie

    I’ve felt that way many times, and that’s usually when I take time to refocus. Last year, I joined the Shafter CBS (community Bible study) with mainly older ladies (65+) and it was just what my soul needed. Life is complicated, and it’s easy to get focused on the wrong things. I’ve never viewed your blog as an attention getting place. You live life the way you feel called to live it, and it’s okay to share that. When I’m in the mood to blog (which hasn’t been much lately), I’ve tried to see it as a place to document AND to socialize and share my life…with far away relatives and friends that I don’t get to see often enough. I’ve had moments of “Iwantobeapopularbloggeritis”, but they’re few and far between. I’d miss you too.

  3. Auntie Linda

    I think your friends (re: the 2 comments) can relate to your thoughts better than I (big surprise…!). I just enjoy reading and seeing pics about you, S. and the kids – helps me keep up on your lives, esp. since you moved.

  4. bandofbrothers

    pride is the root of all our sin, of this i am convinced. thanks for the reminder to always be on guard! i feel like everything depends on the motive of the heart. and some days, let’s just face it. we are all sick. and full of ourselves. i try not to be that way. but i’m sure i’m guilty as charged. that is when we just confess and ask God to forgive us.

  5. Pingback: Thoughtful Thursday: A New Mother, Fighting for Her Life « Daylight Rising

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